back & forth.

when i've decided to give up.
when i've decided to not give a damn.
when it looks like all hope is gone.
suddenly,
u decide to do something.
decide to make plans.
decide to include me in.

will i ever be free from this?
it keeps going back & forth.
a never ending cycle.
how can i stop it?
how can i change it?

i'm not sure how much longer i can hold on.